How to Change Your Mindset

While I was creating this course, I asked around for a lot of feedback.  One girlfriend told me repeatedly, I know I need to improve my mindset but how do I change it?  What I’ve found is that changing your mindset takes three steps – awareness, reframing, and reinforcement.

With awareness, how do we know that our mindset needs to change if we don’t even know what we’re thinking?  Many of us don’t even realize that we’ve been approaching our job search in a negative fashion.  Women have been socialized from an early age that wanting too much money makes us seem gluttonous or greedy.  Some of us have been subtly conditioned that working outside of the home is for men whereas women stay home with the children.  But that doesn’t always make sense.  Women are outpacing men in higher education, divorce rates are skyrocketing, and women are quite often head of households now.  Our mindset towards money and job search needs to change with the times but before we can make that change, we need to recognize what those original beliefs are.

Second, we need to reframe what’s happening in our mind and practice the new mindset.  Practice makes perfect, right?  Let’s say you’re trying to learn tennis.  Just a warning, I play tennis so you may hear this example more than once.  I don’t go to a tennis lesson and then not pick up the racket again until my tennis match.  I have to practice.  I have to find other people to play with and go to clinics.  I have to hit as many tennis balls as I can.  The same goes with reframing your mindset. 

Let’s say one of the topics I cover really hits home like when I discuss that all jobs offer some sort of training.  You hear me say it and it makes sense, but the next time you look at a job description, you start telling yourself, I’ll never be able to do that job because I don’t know software XYZ or I don’t already have skill ABC.  You have to first be aware of your negative mindset then you have to reframe it.  You need to remind yourself that all jobs have training.  You should still apply for that job.  Notice, pause, then reframe.  It works.  After you start catching your negative mindset, you’ll have to practice practice practice to adjust it.

Lastly, one of my favorite techniques for changing mindset is what I’m doing right now – reinforcement or as I like to call it, sharing is caring.  The more I share what I’ve learned with others, the more it instills those thoughts in me.  The same will go for sharing your story.  The more you learn to share your positive mindset with others, the more comfortable it becomes.  It’s also why it’s so important to surround yourself with likeminded people.  It’s no surprise that you’re heavily influenced by the people you spend the most time with – whether it’s in person or virtually like social media.  Are you being lifted up by the people around you and likewise, are you sharing your positive mindset with them? 

In summary, it’s absolutely possible to change your mindset but it takes raising awareness of your current thoughts, practicing to reframe and adjust them, and then to reinforce, share your new positive mindset with others.